Growing up, I was never close with my extended family.
Christmas day would consist of just my immediate family.
Don't get me wrong, I loved having a small and simple Christmas.
Since Alex has a very close knit family, it's been nice to celebrate Christmas in a way I never have before.

I haven't been connected online for the entirety of Christmas, and it has been so nice.
Instead of taking millions of pictures, I just sat back and soaked it all in.
I hope you all had a beautiful Christmas with those you love.



How far along are you? 27 weeks

Weight gain: 20 pounds

Sleep: I did the mistake of taking a nap at 6:30 last night. Woke up at 9:30pm and didn't end up going back until about 1am. Slept all the way through the night though which was nice.

Movement: This past week our little one has been really loving pushing his way up my ribs and squashing my lungs. Just exploring every little place he can I guess.

Favourite moments: Every morning Alex goes under the covers and has a little chat with the baby. It's so adorable. I'm completely smitten with this excited father-to-be.

Weird pregnancy things: A couple days ago I woke up screaming in pain. Alex ran in from the living room and looked pretty worried. I had my first calf cramp and oh my goodness it was painful!! I was limping for a couple days and I couldn't fully stretch my leg. Luckily it's gone away for now.

Happy or moody? Happy

Belly button in or out? In

Stretch marks? Still none.

Looking forward to: Alex and I are packing up for out trip as I type. We are in desperate need of a vacation. 10 days of no school, no work, and seeing family. WAY too excited!!



You can tell it's Christmas break when you loose track of time and end up staying up pretty late playing Password with family.
Watching Alex with Adelaide absolutely melted my heart.
Can't believe that in a few short months, he'll be holding our son!!



How far along are you? 26 weeks

Weight gain: Still at 20, thank goodness.

Sleep: I'm still waking up about twice a night. This morning I woke up at 5, and couldn't get back until 7. I have started taking a late morning nap on a daily basis. Definitely helps me get through the day.

Movement: This little guy has started the habit of having a little party in my belly in the middle of the night. Thankfully now that I am done work, it's not that much of an issue.

Favourite moments: Feeling him move when I sing. I don't know whether he's annoyed, or comforted, it's still precious to feel him respond.

Weird pregnancy things: It takes very little effort for me to become out of breath. The past 3 Sundays we've been rehearsing a song for our Christmas Sunday, and the amount of extra breaths I have to take while singing is quite entertaining. Luckily we're only singing the song once, because by the second time through it I can barely sing.

Happy or moody? Pregnancy has been such a great experience for me. I've had some little hiccups, but on the whole I've never been happier!

Belly button in or out? In

Stretch marks? Still none.

Looking forward to: CHRISTMAS!!!!! Can't wait to see family that we haven't seen since our wedding! Hopefully the baby co-operates and will kick for his Grandma and Grandpa.



I must admit that for the longest time, the concept of raising a child in this world terrified me.
There are so many things about this world that are so messed up.
I wish I could just completely shelter him and keep him close to us his whole life.
I don't want the world to destroy him.
Then I heard this quote and it gave me comfort.

The world is going to get much worse before it gets better.
It's inevitable.
We may not be able to control the world, or the experiences our son goes through, but we can control one thing.
We can control how we raise him, and what we teach him.
I want to be 100% invested in his life.
I want him to feel loved, accepted and valued.
I want him know that home is a place where he will always be safe.

Parenthood still terrifies me, to a certain extent.
But at the end of the day Alex and I will always do what is best for this little one.
I just hope he realizes that.



Well it officially happened.
I am no longer a retail worker.
This is the first time in since I was 5 years old that I haven't been in school, or been employed, or both.
I must admit, I feel slightly strange with this whole concept that I am not returning to work.
Don't get me wrong, all I've ever wanted was to be a stay at home mom, and now that things are actually happening I find myself thinking:
"Is this for real life?"
I'm terrified, excited and completely dumbfounded.

So you may be asking:
"What on earth are you going to be doing for the next 3 months?!"
Well let me tell ya:
Me // First and foremost I plan on listening to my body and taking care of myself. A little bit of pampering and naps. Lots of naps.
Cleaning // Like I said previously I've been in a crazy nesting mood recently, and I plan to take full advantage of this and de-clutter our apartment.
Cooking // Now that I am no longer working, there's is no reason for me to be exhausted by the end of the day that I can not start becoming more adventurous with cooking. Making my first pork roast this week! Eeeek!
Cuddles // Since I used to have to wake up super early all the time, I usually went to bed a couple hours before Alex, so we couldn't cuddle to sleep. Taking full advantage of that now!

I just can't wait until I can meet the little boy growing inside me.
But for now I plan on making myself busy so time will just fly by :)



While I was reading an old journal last night, I had a thought.
Is this how I want to be remembered?
I wrote in this journal only 4 years ago, yet I cringed at how selfish and prone to complain I was.
Even though I was going through a pretty rough patch, I wish I had written in a more thankful and optimistic way.
I wish I could have handled those situations and trials with more maturity and strength, as opposed to pointing the finger at other people and talking about their faults.
I wish I had written more about how I was feeling, and less about events that have had absolutely zero significance in my life.

I can't help but think what my future ancestors would think if they read this journal.
What would they learn from me?
How would they imagine me?
What characteristics would they want to emulate?

After that little epiphany I've come to a decision:
It's time to start journaling again.
But this time I want to really ponder and take time to write about my thoughts, my feelings and my testimony.
I want to be remembered as loving, gentle, and honest.
Someone who was less concerned about herself, and more for those around her.
Someone I want to become.



How far along are you? 25 weeks (!!)

Weight gain: 20 pounds

Sleep: I now only wake up twice every night, which is a big improvement! Again my body temperature is constantly changing so I wake up once because I am sweating, and then one more time because I start to shiver. But hey I'll take over the restlessness I've been having the past 2 months!

Movement: I'm feeling him all the time now. Unfortunately he likes to play around when other people try to feel him move. It's as if he knows when it's my hand and when it's not. Little stinker!

Favourite moments: Having customers at work ask me when I'm due. I love how I look obviously pregnant now. And I love even more talking and getting excited with complete strangers. Babies just make everyone happy :)

Weird pregnancy things: (1) Nesting, nesting, nesting. I did a serious clean out of the second bedroom last Friday. I had 7 garbage bags of random stuff to get rid of. My plan for this week is to conquer the shelves in the closet. (2) My sciatic nerve is still giving me grief. If I am on my feet for longer than 2 hours it really starts to pinch.

Fitness: I have been trying to do minimal workouts. Especially since I am going to be done work soon, I want to start an actual weekly schedule so I can keep my body moving for the next 3 months before baby arrives.

Happy or moody? Still happy!

Belly button in or out? In. Although I think it is getting ready to pop. Time will tell.

Stretch marks? Not yet.

Looking forward to: Being done with work. I officially have 2 more shifts... it feels weird to think about it, but a good kind of weird.



Nesting has officially begun around here.
Yesterday Alex and I picked up the crib, and couldn't help but set it up right away.
I have spent the last 3 hours cleaning out the second bedroom.
The closet especially was full of stuff that I just couldn't part with for whatever reason.
But I decided I needed to brutal with myself, and 7 garbage bags later I feel much, much better!!!!
It's starting to actually look like a nursery, instead of a makeup/dumping ground room.


Last night Alex kept whispering to me: "There's a crib in the other room"
We would then get giddy just thinking about the fact that in a few months there will be a baby sleeping in that crib.
It's getting real people.



1// Solly Baby Wrap - I've heard great reviews about this baby wrap, and I can't wait to carry around our little one in it :)
2// Moleskine journal - I really want to start journaling everyday again, and I love this bright yellow journal.
3// Initial Necklace - I've been wanting one of these with an "A" on it for a while. I just love the simplicity and sentimentality of it.
4// Sleepshirt - The only comfy types of PJs right now are nightgowns. Only problem is my flannel ones are too hot to wear at night, and I only have one that fits right now.
5// Girl Online - Since I'm going to have couple months off before baby arrives, I want to read as much as I can before my time becomes completely focused on the little one.
6// Orla Kiely baby books - I'm absolutely in love with baby books right now, and these ones are so adorable! I love the colours
7// Bath Bombs - You can never have too many baths!
8// She & Him Classics - She & Him are among one of my favourite musicians



I must say I look forward to the day when decorating for Christmas also involves outside decorations.

Yesterday we had the prettiest, fluffiest snowfall.
There is nothing better than being inside, having nowhere to go and watching the snow come down.
Makes me feel more and more Christmasy.

And now I am currently cuddled up in a flannel nighty after having worked a 5 hour shift.
I must admit I wasn't too happy when I first found out that I would have to finish work 3 months earlier than I planned.
Financially it made perfect sense for me to go as long as I could at work so we could continue to add to our cushiony savings.
However with it being retail, and Christmas being impossible to book off (literally impossible) my last day is December 23rd.
After the past 2 weeks I am actually relieved to have a few months break before the baby comes.
My sciatic nerve has been acting up and it hasn't exactly been fun.
Only a couple more shifts to go!!!
And then I will be done with retail indefinitely.



How far along are you? 24 weeks

Due Date: A couple days ago when I told someone how far along I was they commented: "Only 16 more weeks to go!". It literally blew my mind! I can't believe it's close to 3 months away!!!!!

Weight gain: 20 pounds

Sleep: Again, no improvement. He's become quite active while I'm sleeping, so of course it wakes me up. To be honest, I don't really mind it. Makes me smile.

Movement: Tons and tons.

Favourite moments: Last night I spent the evening with Andrew, Kelsi, Norah and Adelaide. Since Adelaide is a few weeks old, I've become obsessed with snuggling her. She slept on my chest for about 2 hours. She slowly slid down to my belly and her hands spread across it as if to give her little cousin a hug. He was moving around quite a lot and it didn't bother her one bit. Such a tender little moment.

Happy or moody? Happy, happy!!

Belly button in or out? In

Looking forward to: Visiting family in Winnipeg for Christmas. I can not wait to see everyone and have lots of "baby topic chats"



Some mornings you just need to make some waffles.
And today was one of those mornings.
This past week has just been incredible.
I only have one shift, so I have been able to sleep in, get some chores done and just enjoy life more.
Definitely not looking forward to working Black Friday.
Ah well, just a few more weeks then I will be done!



How far along are you? 23 weeks

Weight gain: just about 17 pounds. I must admit that it is getting harder and harder to watch the scale go up. I understand that the weight I am gaining is important for his growth, I just want to make sure I'm gaining a healthy amount.

Sleep: My body temperature has been up and down lately. I'll wake up sweating, then a few hours later freezing. So sleeping is still a little struggle

Movement: He has been moving like crazy the past week and it makes me giggle every time.

Favourite moments: Last Thursday, Alex was able to feel the him move for the first time. It was so sweet to his face light up. It's become part of our evening routine to sit on the couch and wait for him to start moving. We went to see Mockingjay last Saturday (amazing!) and during the bombing of District 13, he was kicking around non stop. It's cute to feel him react to things.

Happy or moody? Mostly happy, but because of the lack of sleep lately I've become a tad moody now and again.

Belly button in or out? In

Looking forward to: Seeing my midwife next week. I haven't seen her in a month, and I love our visits. She is just an encyclopaedia of information and I always feel confident after our appointments.

Also if you want a tear jerker, listen to this song. I can't stop listening to it, and every time I do I shed a tear or two.



This time last week there was snow on the ground.
I was convinced that it was here to stay, but yesterday we had a random "spring day" and it has all melted.
Luckily we got some Christmasy pictures done while the snow was here.



As much as I love trying new hairstyles, I get easily frustrated if they turn out to be too complicated or time consuming.
So I thought I would show you all a super quick and easy updo that I have been obsessed with recently.
Step one// I find this style works best with 2nd day hair that has loose waves (tutorial coming soon)

Step two// Grab a section of hair near the crown of your head and lightly backcomb

Step three// Centre part your hair starting below your ears. This way you don't have a part from the top of your head all the way down to your bun.

Step four// Braid both sections of hair. Lightly pull the braids to give them more texture.

Step five// Take one braid and twist around one time so the braid lays flat against your head. Pin in place.

Step six// Wrap the end of the braid underneath the section you just pinned down.

Step seven// Repeat on the other side

Step eight// Continue to pin where necessary.

This hairstyle looks great with with a centre or side part. I personally like to have a few pieces pulled out to frame my face.

Hope you enjoy!



Alex made we wait until the first official snowfall to put up the Christmas tree.
Luckily it happened this past Sunday, so I didn't have to wait too long.
Winter is already in full swing in Ottawa.
Bitterly, bitterly cold and already slushy after only one snow fall.
But so far I'm actually loving it (surprisingly)
It's getting more and more excited for Christmas and go on a little vacation to visit family.


I started writing this post yesterday evening.
An event has occurred that has left both Alex and I pretty mad and exhausted.
I make it sound like the end of the world, when it reality it's not a huge deal.
Well it is to us.

Last year we bought a pre-lit Christmas tree.
Sammy would constantly play with it and the branches would fall down.
We've noticed over the past week that because they fell down so much last year, they just fall down by themselves now.
So we assumed Sammy wasn't the problem.
Let me emphasize again that we purchase a pre-lit tree.

Last night we heard something at about 12:30.
Alex runs out to the living room to find that Sammy had completely bit through the cord you need in order to plug the tree in.
Needless to say, our tree now does not light up.
Not only did we spend quite a bit of money on this tree, but now I feel that the whole "magical" aspect of a Christmas tree is gone.

It may sound pathetic, but let me explain.
I have countless memories of the Christmas season of me lying on my couch, all lights off, except for the Christmas tree, having my parent's tell (over and over again) stories from when they were children.
I always loved those moments.
The world just seemed to stand still.
It felt like Christmas would last forever.
And now because of our stupid cat, I don't have that.

Sorry Sammy, I do love ya.
But man, sometimes you're not all angel.



How far along are you? 22 weeks. Officially over half way there (well that is if baby arrives on schedule)

Due date: March 25th. Seems like forever away, but I'm sure it will fly by, especially since the past 3 months have!

Weight gain: 15 lbs. 5 pounds up since my last bumpdate...which I hate to admit was only two weeks ago. I blame it on the Halloween candy. It was bad!

Sleep: As I mentioned in a previous post, it's a major struggle at the moment. I'm super restless and am exhausted all the time

Movement: This little man has finally made an active appearance when it comes to movement. I felt my first flutter at about 18/19 weeks, but his movement are now very noticeable and distinct. I usually feel them in the evening, once I've relaxed and come home from work. I sit down and boom he skirts around. Loving every minute of it!

Food cravings: Nothing in particular anymore. Now and again I want something specific, but for the most part my appetite is just back to normal. Which is nice, since I had a few months where all I could eat was hummus and pita.

Favourite moments: (1) Having little conversations with him. Alex and I have started the habit of talking my stomach and I love it. (2) Having people at work comment on how much I've popped in the past 3 weeks. I'm happy to say that so far all the weight gain has literally been in the belly (well and boobs if I must be honest..tmi? ah well)

Happy or moody? Let's just say sob fest. It doesn't take much for me to cry these days.

Looking forward to: (1) Finishing work. My last day is December 23rd, and although it kind of scares me being out of work, I am ready to completely focus on this pregnancy and getting things ready! (2) Alex being able to feel the baby move. So far all the movement has been internal, so I can't wait for him to see/feel what I've been feeling for the past few weeks!



Growing up, people always used to think my family was crazy for putting our Christmas tree up the first week of November.
Apparently now it's "cool" to put your tree up early.
Sorry for bursting everyone's bubble, but the Wagner family is cooler than your family (well in regards to Christmas that is)
This time of year has always been my favourite. 
The smells, the food, the decorations, the movies, the music, the family time, the everything!!!

Also I must mention how beautiful it feels to hold little baby Adelaide.
Of course I'm having more tender feelings than usual when it comes to babies simply because it's becoming more and more real to me that in a few months I'll be holding our own little bundle.



This week has been rough.
Real rough.
I haven't had a good night's sleep for over a week now.
Our snoring neighbour who lives on the floor above us hasn't helped my restlessness!
My emotions have been all over the map.
When Alex went to work on Tuesday, I bawled my eyes out.
For the majority of the pregnancy I have been pretty happy, but for some reason this week has just been hard.
I've felt selfish, and lazy.
I didn't shower for two days in a row.
I've watched (and re watched) countless Youtube videos.
Decided to watch (for the 4th time) my favourite TV show (shown above).
Today is the only day that I've actually made the bed.

Although this week has sucked, there are a few things that have been good (thank goodness!)
+ Every time I have woken up, Alex wakes up so we can cuddle and talk.
+ My second niece was born on Thursday at 3:14 am. Adelaide Grace Wagner. Holding her just hours after she was born has made this whole pregnancy thing real to me. Can't wait to hold my little bundle in a few months!
+ My parents just got back from a 3 week vacation to England, and they kindly brought back some crumpets and Primula (along with many other goodies!)
+ Candy Cane ice cream is in grocery stores again! Bring on Christmas.

So here's to having a much better week this week.



My husband is too adorable. As much as he hates getting his picture taken, he always lets me take random shots so I can try out some new things with my camera.

Sentences I've said multiple times over the past couple of months:
"Hey could you pick up some pizza on the way home? Baby want pizza."
"Would you mind getting some Rice Krispies? I'm craving them so bad."
"I really want a Frosty. Could you run to Wendy's and grab me one?"
"Could we just stay home and watch a movie?"
"I need to take a nap. Could you cuddle me until I fall asleep?"
"I just don't want to cook. Can we order food instead?"
"My back is killing me. Could I have a shoulder rub?"

I sound like the most needy, demanding pregnant woman.
Luckily I married the sweetest boy who just turns to me, smiles and says:
"Of course"
I swear I feel like Princess Buttercup.

I just can't wait to see how he interacts with our little one.
Alex, you're going to be the sweetest dad.
Seriously, I'm so excited to see it!!



Alex and I always loved the idea of having our first child being a boy.
Since I grew with two older brothers, I think having a brother to look out for you is always sweet.
For the past few weeks though, I kept getting feelings that we were going to have a girl.
So when the technician told us: "You're having a little boy!" I was completely surprised!
Not at all what I was expecting, but we couldn't be happier.
I am officially surrounded by boys in our little home now.

Can't wait to meet this little fella in March.



I wish I had a valid reason for not blogging the past month and a half.
But I don't.
For some reason I was just not in the mood to blog.
But I am back from a nice little break, and am ready to update you all about life and the pregnancy.

How far along are you? 20 weeks. 
Sleep: I had a month of really bad sleeping patterns, but it has finally calmed down. Although I do get very realistic/weird dreams.
Movement: Just little flutters here and there
Food Cravings: Cream cheese and jam on a pita. I've literally had it for lunch for about 3 weeks straight now.
Queasy or Sick: Nope!! I had the usual waves of nausea during the first few weeks, but no more!
Gender: We found out yesterday...You'll just have to wait until tomorrow to find out!
Symptoms: I wake up with a numb left leg every morning, and my tailbone gets pretty achey if I am sitting down for too long. Not to mention I get tired super duper easily!
Belly Button in or out: In.
Weight Gain: 10 pounds
Happy or Moody: I think Alex has to be the one to answer this, but I think for the most part I've been happy.



+ listening to this song
+ wondering if I'm carrying a little girl or boy
+ thinking about how much life has changed over the past 2 years
+ eating cheese roll ups (wonder bread with melted Kraft singles rolled up in gooey greatness)
+ re-watching TV series backwards (trust me, you see so many new things if you watch seasons in the reverse order)
+ napping



Over the past few years I have read countless amount of posts about how hard marriage is.
And I can't help but cringe every time I read them.

Alex and I have been married a little over a year, but I still think in some instances we're a little clueless and new to this whole marriage thing.
Yes we've had disagreements.
Yes I've had to remove myself from situations in order to cool down.
But that doesn't mean that marriage has to be this overly complicated battle that we need to label "hard".

There are so many different types of relationships.
Friend to friend.
Boss to employee.
Teacher to student.
Parent to child.
Sibling to sibling.
And just like every relationship, they are between two imperfect people.
Every relationship needs work in order to grow.
But if we focus too much on how "hard" the work may be, we loose sight of the beauty in each relationship.

What is hard is life.
Every family has different circumstances that can be very difficult.
But that doesn't mean that the relationships within that family have to be hard.
One thing that I will forever be grateful for is that fact that I never once heard my parents shouting at each other.
I was raised to believe that marriage is between two people who realize that they aren't perfect, but know that love is.
No matter what life threw at our family and their marriage, I never doubted their love for each other or for me.

When we went away for our anniversary weekend I remember thinking back on our first year as husband and wife.
Even though we had our stressful moments, I really don't remember the specifics of our disagreements.
What I remember the most is how much fun we had.

Yes life as a married person can be hard at times, but marriage is not.
And that is my rant for the day.



Life has kicked back into full gear.
Alex is go go go with school and work.
I'm exhausted from working (even after only 3 shifts a week)
Looking at these pictures makes me miss the beach.
Time literally stood still for a week.
I just wish we could have stayed even longer.



I love that no matter which country I visit, I am still overwhelmed by the beauty and Spirit of temples.
Life is always full steam ahead, never stopping.
But once I step into the front doors, time seems to stand still.
All the worries and struggles of life go away and I get just a glimpse into eternity.

I am so glad Alex and I made the decision, before we had even met, that we would marry in the temple.
Neither one of us was willing to compromise on that.
That simple but significant decision has made all the difference.



Fall weather has arrived in Ottawa, and I am loving it!
Windows are wide open, boots and cardigans are being worn and the leaves are starting to change colour.
Even though this means winter is right around the corner, I still love this time of year.



My favourite drink on the earth is called a Lime Rickey.
It is a concoction created with Sierra Mist, raspberry syrup and freshly squeezed lime juice.
Heaven in a plastic cup.

I always have my favourite ice cream: Moose tracks.
This time, unfortunately (because of baby), my appetites are very random.
Food that I normally love, for the time being just make my stomach turn.
It kind of sucks.
Especially when I had to pass on my favourite ice cream.
Then again, it's worth it ;)



I like to call this little bump my "pooch". Still in the looks-like-she's-put-on-a-few-pounds stage
I am three years old.
I am helping my mom make cookies.
Since we're home alone, she gives me both mixer beaters so I can lick them clean.
I think I'm being super sneaky when I continue to scoop out a little dough and eat it, but I feel like she knew all along what I was doing and just let me have my fun.
Once the cookies are done, she pours me a glass of milk and we sit and eat a few.
We have countless home videos of me while I was a baby/toddler, but I think this is my very first memory, that was never caught on film.
I knew in that very moment, that I all I ever wanted to be was a mom.

March 2014
Alex and I had a plan.
We wanted to have a year of being newlyweds before we started trying for a family.
But as we begun to pray about it, we felt we needed to start trying a few months earlier than planned
For the first time in my life I was terrified with the idea of becoming a mother.
And that feeling made me realize it was time to start.
After a false alarm, I kind of just stopped thinking about it.

July 26 2014
Out of nowhere I turn to Alex and say: "Maybe we should buy a pregnancy test"
I'm not sure why I felt this way.
I didn't think I was pregnant.
Nothing felt different.
But we bought the test anyway.

July 27, 2014
7:15 am.
I go take a little tinkle, glance at the test after a few minutes and see: +
For the past year I have taken a grand total of 6 negative pregnancy tests.
I was so in the habit to seeing a negative that I was definitely not expecting a positive.
I burst into tears right then and there on the bathroom floor.
I run out of the bathroom and jump onto my sleeping husband screaming:
"WE'RE PREGNANT!!!!!!!!"
After a few minutes he finally comes to and we are giddy and excited.

I still feel like I'm dreaming.
That this pregnancy is all in my head, and there's no baby.
It's weird to think that the moment that I have been waiting and preparing for is finally here.
There's a little one growing inside me.
I get to be he/she's mom.

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